GR8 PL8s U FUKH3D!

Number plates, something that gives your vehicle and ID, they can let a whole system of people and businesses know a little about the car, and in the right kind of business, a little about the driver as well. Easily the biggest system of all is the human race, no one sees your number plate more than the general public themselves, which is why my brain turns to mush when I am left to ponder why you would make a public spectacle of yourself by getting the wankiest, shittiest number plates a person could ever think of.

 

For example, would you wear a t shirt with “(your name here)’s T shirt” or “my short sleeve polo” (actually come to think about it, number plates don’t require grammar, so “myshrtslvplo”) The answer for most people would be, NO. No you wouldn’t, it would be fucking stupid to do such a thing. We either know who you are therefore no need to tell us again, or we don’t, therefore we wouldn’t give a shit, the outcome similar to the one above. This brings me to my point of why would you label your car this way? I would almost have to say that it is worse if it is your car, if your car has number plates that are prefixed by “my” or “our” then seriously, you need help. Let’s try and comprehend what they could actually mean. You are driving your car right? Umm… it is the same car it was when you purchased it? It does have adequate badges reminding you what it is before you step into it? You do actually know what you purchased don’t you? Ok, you know who you are and hopefully you know what your car is, sorry to say this, but people that don’t know you, couldn’t give a fuck if your name is “rob” or “mac” and the general public would be aware by now what a commodore is. Shit, we have it rammed down our throat often enough by that fucking box in our houses. So, why the need to tell everyone all of that useless info? Anyway, as if the car that you have clearly labeled isn’t your fucking car, not that many cars get flogged every single day that society is now feeling the need to write our names on them!

 

Possibly worse, is the person who feels the need to just simply tell us what the car is. At least the last lot of clowns told us something that we didn’t know (albeit, we couldn’t give a fuck) these fuckin idiots are telling us something that we can clearly see for ourselves, so not to be outdone by the monotony of day to day life, you guys are adding to that by telling us a couple of times what model your car is, great, thanks heaps for that champ. I always have a hard time understanding the logic behind these plates, do you often forget what your car is? Do you need to be told 25 times a day what it is, or is it to show everyone that even though it is an extremely average car, that you have a knowledge of automobiles, and to prove it you choose to display said knowledge on the outside of your vehicle a few more times.  Then there are the ones that try and tell you stuff or be witty, fuck me, maybe to communicate with these people properly I need “rage-31” number plates, cause these are seriously fucking stupid. I see plenty of these moronic plates around everyday, namely I saw one the other day that was (abbreviated obviously) why are you second (you can work it out.) on a shitty fucking girls car. I can’t even explain the stupidity of these plate, so I’ll start by trying to answer this insanely profound question as to why I am actually second. It was peak hour on the carpark we like to call the monash freeway when I saw this abomination, me being second wasn’t really an issue, as everyone you could see was stopped, and I wouldn’t really see this drive home as a race, but, the question was, why was I second? First of all dickweed I wasn’t second as there was a few thousand cars on the freeway at that point in time, just as there is every afternoon. The reason I was behind you is because you didn’t let me merge you fucking clown, but the reason for not letting me merge would be purely to come first, wouldn’t it? But then wouldn’t you have to merge in front of every car ever. If in fact he did do that, then he shouldn’t be allowed to have those number plates. Surely he should be able to get a fine for that shit, maybe even jail time! Vic roads give you fines for too low, too loud, what about plain old too fucking stupid?

 

Those two are just the tip of the iceberg, there are a million more stupid plates out there, dumbass sexual reference ones, ones that someone in kindergarten could get laughed at for the complete disregard to anything remotely close to resembling English, ones referring to different modes of transport, fuck, just about all of the dumbest shit you can ever think of has been done. The sad thing is that a lot of people are proud that their car makes a spectacle day in day out, ah well, a lot of people do a lot of silly things, this being one, good on ya, if you like being perceived as a fucking idiot. Obviously you don’t though because you have your idiocy on display all day every day. Just like that tattoo of a dick on your left ass cheek, I believe you when you say you were pissed, promise!